The wonder of family

One of the best things in my life is my family. They support me through everything. I’m a single, young, female professional, living on my own in Houston. Being the independent type, I didn’t hesitate to move halfway across the country during and after college. I wanted to work for NASA, and when that job came my way, I wasn’t about to let the distance and potential solitude stand in my way! It helped, though, that I knew that no matter the distance, my family would always support me. My mom and stepfather wound up moving from Florida to Austin, Texas, shortly after I came to Houston full time; they’re now close enough for me to see once a month or so. Even if they’d stayed in Florida, though, I know we’d have stayed close, emotionally. That’s the kind of family we have.

When I was a kid, it was just Mom, my sister, and me. We lived in the woods in northern Virginia, just the three of us, and we had a great time. I remember curling up on the couch, Mom reading to us by candle and fire light during a snow storm. I remember laughter and joy and easy weekend mornings. It wasn’t all shiny, but overall it was very good. Things naturally changed when we moved to Florida; things got harder as my sister and I grew up. We added Michael, my now-stepfather, to our family — that was an adjustment, but he soon became as important to me as the others. There were troubled times during teenage years, but no matter how bad things got, we were all still family.

You’d think, as I went off to college and my sister moved up to Ohio, that we’d grow apart. As we kids grew into adults, though, we were able to shake off the troubled teenage years and grow together despite the miles. My sister and I now keep in touch better than ever through the wonders of the internet and cell phones (texting is such a great invention). I know that when I need her, she’s got my back.

I’m pondering the wonders of family now because my mom came to visit me this weekend. I’d given her a couple big revelations about myself to chew over in the last couple of years, and she was finally ready to talk about them. I’d been nervous and stressed going into the weekend, not knowing how things would turn out. It was an uncomfortable feeling — this new idea that something could drive a wall between my mother and me. She truly is my biggest support structure; what would I do if I lost that? Thankfully I didn’t have to find out. Mom and I spent the weekend talking. Just talking — no high emotional drama, just some good, deep conversations about life. I found out what’s on her mind, and she found out what’s on mine. We both came away from it feeling a lot better about things. I can’t express how grateful I am for that. We might not agree on everything, but in the long run that doesn’t matter. What matters is that she supports me, no matter what.

Life is never easy. There are ups and downs and sharp curves in the road that leave you white-knuckled on the steering wheel. It’s important to have a good support structure. Family, friends, coworkers, a church group, a knitting group… Whoever loves you and supports you, whether they’re near or far — cherish them. Lean on them when you need to. That’s what they’re there for. And nothing can replace that.

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